I will be on holidays from July 17th until Augustus 12th 2024. Messages will be answered a.s.a.p. after my holidays. Thank you for your understanding.
Ik ben op vakantie van 17 juli tot 12 augustus 2024. Berichten worden z.s.m. na mijn vakantie beantwoord. Bedankt voor je begrip.
5 Comments
Michelle · November 17, 2021 at 9:10 pm
This was interesting. I worked on the need from anxiety/panic attacks, I need Michelle to give me the attention I deserve and questioned I need that from her. No came up for me in Q1 which my mind was doubting but I moved onto Q3. I noticed anxieties reaction was very much like my own when I need attention from others and I believe I deserve it from them. Without the thought in Q4 all is well and there is a very big difference with and without this thought. The demander has gone. The TAs were interesting. I don’t need that from her (Michelle). What came up was that anxiety didn’t need this attention from Michelle but wanted it. It said, I’m her friend, I am the friendly universe, I love her, I’m here to help, support, guide and love her. I’m here to reMIND her who she is and show her the way home to herself – she is the light. The other TA, I need that from me was quite different. It felt more what I need from me rather than what anxiety needs from anxiety but I am trusting what came up. It reads, I am unsettled in myself and so I need me to trust in myself to be. I need me to give me the attention I am seeking from Michelle. I need me to look me in the eye and meet myself and give me the attention I need. I’m split in two. I see Michelle as being my savior, and I see that I could give me the attention I give to her to myself and cut the middle woman out. Gosh the energy I spend trying to get her (Michelle) attention when I could give me that. It’s my job until it’s not. It’s all love, all of it. Trust in me. Follow your heart. All is well.
marijketops · November 18, 2021 at 9:52 am
I love your sharing, Michelle! Especially to “cut the middle woman out” 🙂 I also love that you allowed yourself to experience whatever came up and not tried ‘to get it’ or ‘to do it right’. That’s just perfect!
Michelle · November 17, 2021 at 11:25 pm
Insight: I noticed that if I call a panic attack a panic attack, I am in the ‘I know mind’ and fall into the loop of the imagined past and future and off I go into the daymare. I had the realisation that I can treat it like the morning walk and notice it without naming it, and notice what happens. “An unquestioned mind is the only suffering” BK. When I name it panic attack, I suffer as I have a story of panic attacks, I have past and future images and I have imagined feelings/sensations. I am interested to practice the morning walk exercise and notice what happens. I can also question , I experienced panic attacks.
marijketops · November 18, 2021 at 9:53 am
Exactly so! That is why I value the morning walk so much. Thát in combination with inquiry is what sets me free!
Nanou Anne · December 19, 2021 at 9:24 am
Anxiety said: I want you to let me be.
I am facilitating anxiety, asking it, is it true? Yes.
Can you absolutely know it is true? No.
And how do you react, what happens when you believe the thought, I want Nanou Anne to let me be? I want to show her I am powerful, that she is not going to win.
Who would you be without the thought? Working with her and not against her.
How would you turn the thought around? I want me to let myself be. She has a story about me, I have a story about her, we are in this power struggle, this passive/aggressive game. If I get on with my business, at least one of us is doing it, it is a beginning.
I want me to let her be. If I let her be, I will have one story instead of two, mine. She is not longer the ennemy. We can start communicating out of kindness.
I don’t want Nanou Anne to let me be. That is not her job, that’s my job. She cannot control me, I can stop trying so hard.
I want her to try and control me. I am seeing the pattern: I have to use more power, I have to prove that I exist, as if she would let me be it could mean I don’t exist.
With that inquiry and my partner work on “it’s holding me down” I am observing the passive attitude: (victimhood and blaming) and the agressive attitude (strength and rightfullness) And even these are interchangeable.